Director: Jim Wynorski
Written by: Steve Mitchell & Jim Wynorski
Starring: Kelli Maroney, Tony O’Dell, Russell Todd, Karrie Emerson, Barbara Crampton, Nick Segal, John Terlesky, Suzee Slater, Paul Bartel, Mary Woronov, Dick Miller, Gerrit Graham, Mel Welles, Angus Scrimm
Taglines:“Where shopping costs you an arm and a leg!”
“Chopping Mall – Where they slash their prices – and their customers!”
“Buy or Die”
“Half Off is just the beginning!”
“At Park Plaza Mall the security force isn’t just tight, it’s terrifying!”
“Shop till you drop – dead!”
STORY
Park Plaza Mall is the first mall in the US to use a new state-of-the-art security system. This involves using three robots fully armed with deadly lasers and controlled by a central computer, and an automatic system that locks the mall down after dark.
One night, a group of teenagers stay late after work to have a party, but the central computer is struck by lightning. Unlike in Short Circuit, this turns the robots into lethal killing machines intent of taking out the “intruders” in the mall.
OPINION
Chopping Mall is one of those mid-80s low budget gems that looks terrible but is actually quite enjoyable. Director Jim Wynorski hasn’t done a great deal of note for the genre – although he’s been highly prolific since this period, he’s mostly turned out terrible horror movies like Ghoulies 4 and Komodo vs. Cobra, alongside soft-core porn spoofs like Witches Of Breastwick and The Bare Wench Project.
So, I didn’t expect much of this movie when I finally caught it on late-night TV a few years ago, but the idea of killer versions of Johnny 5 did appeal to me enough for me to make time for it. I’m glad I did, as the resulting movie isn’t half bad. Well, yes it is, but in a good way!
The movie starts with a demonstration of the robots taking down a thief with tasers (they’re programmed not to kill, at least till the lightning strikes… though that raises the question of why they’re armed with lethal weapons!). Then, we’re plunged straight into a sequence that shows exactly what’s wrong and right with the movie we’re about to watch. The demonstration continues live, with first Barbara Crampton (from Re-Animator) and then an anonymous technician answering questions and showing how a bar-coded ID badge helps avoid Robocop-style accidents.
Unfortunately, the robots are rather immobile during this sequence. Impressively, there are actually three robots on-screen at any one time, and they do actually move quite well for a low-budget mid-80s horror flick, but they’re not very quick – later sequences in the movie noticeably make the characters slow down or get trapped by constant laser fire so that the robots can actually pose any threat to them.
Also during this sequence, we have the first of a number of comedic moments, and one of the first Roger Corman in-jokes. Paul Bartel and Mary Woronov reprise their roles as characters from the black comedy Eating Raoul, making barbed comments at the presentation. The problem is, the jokes go on too long and aren’t particularly funny if you haven’t seen and enjoyed the movie. Better cameos happen later on from other Corman regulars such as Dick Miller (reprising his roles from A Bucket of Blood), Mel Welles and Gerrit Graham (as well as a very quick cameo from Phantasm‘s Angus Scrimm).
Following a credit sequence with some OK jokes following customer in the mall, we meet a typical set of 80s movie teenagers – the jock, nerd, yuppie, etc. However, the central characters are quite unusual in the the nerdy guy gets the girl! Anyway, after meeting our collection of victims, the movie plays out like a slasher movie. The two technicians in charge of the robots are quickly killed off, then the robots head off into the mall at their pre-programmed midnight time slot and start killing off the kids.
It’s a pretty enjoyable movie if you have a decent level of tolerance for silly humour and mid-80s cliches in among your horror. It never outstays its welcome, running at just 77 minutes.
Rating: 
TRAILER
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